Straight men with gay sex

Of far greater importance for their sexual identity were “romantic relationships with women, childrearing, integration in straight communities, and how they perceived their masculinity.”

In an email exchange, I asked Tony Silva about the significance of his research: “It demonstrates that there are many different populations of men who have sex with men.

Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press. These men determined same-sex sexual activity did not challenge their heterosexual identity because:[v]

• There was little to no emotional attachment between partners
• There was no pretense of commitment between partners
• The activity was infrequent in comparison to sexual activity with females

In tally, the men interviewed reported that if sexual activity between men was anonymous, experimental, occasional, or if substance use was involved, the act was not “gay.”

Finally, while there is conflicting data, it appears that non-gay identified MSM engage in high levels of drug and alcohol use.[vi] Many in fact engage in sexual activity with other men as a means of obtaining financial resources to procure such substances.

These guys are different from men who identify as bisexual, gay, mostly gay, and mostly straight. Of course, some identify as straight but are in reality closeted bisexuals or gays by sexual orientation—perhaps likely to come out at a later age (if ever).

The contrast Silva makes between identity and orientation and the various meanings same-sex behavior has for individuals were well illustrated by the mostly straight young men I interviewed.